When the cold winds of January blew in a snowy winter wonderland, I cheered for our good fortune to have a Southern facing home. With the trusty TORO snow-blower purring like a cat, I would eat through the snow like it was butter. And as the day would go on, my driveway would dry from the Sun’s glorious rays.

I didn’t expect to find myself cursing the Sun this summer. Keeping my grass in the front from dying has proven to be a monumental task. I should have known it would be like this, our backyard in our old house was always a step away from cactus-ville.

The difference being that I could ignore the backyard if I wanted to, I have to see the front every day. It got even worse when our builder decided to finally level out our front lawn (there was a depression from an incorrectly back-filled sewer line), the already old and close to withering death grass that they put down was barely holding on before we went on vacation to Vermont.

When I saw that we were having 100 degree weather back home, I could just imagine the straw I would be coming home to. Yeah, it did turn out to be pretty brutal, I have two nice large dead sections. That phone call should be fun to the builder.

So now we are attempting to bring our lawn back from the dead, watering morning and night every other day. Walking out in the morning to turn on the sprinklers, getting my feet wet on dew, and invariably getting a shot from the sprinkler.. really makes me jealous of people with sprinkler systems — Lucky bastards!

Our last day in Vermont had finally arrived and we awoke with a lingering sorrow in our hearts. It was pretty amazing how much fun we had and how much we liked Vermont. I still can’t get over how much fun the hiking was and how laid back the towns seem compares to Illinois.

While I am sure the bigger cities have are just as “busy” as Illinois, I really enjoyed the more relaxed feeling that Jericho and its surrounding areas have. Thankfully we had done some packing the night before so the focus on packing was limited, which let us really focus of enjoying the little time we had before would leave.

The group as a whole decided to head to the Village Cup for breakfast, it just seemed easier and lets face it, having someone else make you food is always nice when you are tired and just not in the mood to cook.

I made up my mind to order the Monte Cristo. Phlerb snaked the last one they had on our last trip, I would not be denied. But I was, not by Phlerb but Karin who felt we just didn’t have the time it would take to make. I shrugged and ordered an equally fattening, but less time intensive breakfast.

Before I knew it breakfast was over and we had to say our goodbyes. We waved goodbye and started on our way to Niagara. As I drove down the road a Japanese Anime teardrop formed on the side of one of my eyes in my mind.

The inner tourist in us forced its way out as we drove towards New York. We decided to stop at the Vermont Teddy Bear factory to check it out and take the tour. We could feel the invisible pull on our wallets the closer we got to the store.

Stepping inside the Mecca of all things Bear I was happy to see that the did have cheaper alternatives for sale, but we decided what really was the point of buying something made in Taiwan and made onsite by us in a manner similar to build a bear?

So we decided to buy an actual Vermont Teddy Bear made in the good old state of Vermont. We tried to convince ourselves that the lifetime guarantee made the almost $60 worth it (I am still trying by the way).

To be honest, the tour was pretty lame compared to what we did with Phlerb and Shanin. Maverick seemed to enjoy the cheesy presentation, they lost me after the recital of the factory history, which I found the most enjoyable.

Maverick really wanted to get a costume for the bear, no big deal we thought. While Karin stood in line Mav did chalk outside with another kid and our tour guide who had chalk for the kids to use.

When Karin came out she looked slightly pissed. I asked her what was wrong and she told me that the outfit cost $35.00. A few minutes later when the smelling salts brought me around, she told me that Maverick had just spent his birthday money on the outfit. Lesson to be learned — Stay away from tourist traps when you don’t have a local, or a jar of gypsy tears to keep you safe.

Anyway, I really am not in the mood to write a part 7 to cover Canada, so here is a condensed summary:

Long trip through NY, Got lost in Ghetto trying to get to Bridge, Crossed over, ID? Passport? Not asked for.

Stayed at Sheraton, good view of falls from room balcony, shitty location (near Wrestling Pile Driver ride), bathroom leak from ceiling, tiniest bathroom ever. Comfy bed, ahhhh.

Next morning, Maid of the Mist Boat Tour (Cool!), IMAX 20 Year old Niagara file (eh.. so, so), Spiderman Ride at hotel (Biggest ripoff ever).

Left for home through Canada, No Garmin Maps, Crappy Rand McNally Directions, Got lost, 1 hour lost, back on track, long drive. Get to US border, take picture of two signs, told to delete photos because of War, Gestapo reviewed all documents, interrogated us about our Canada purchases (Book, Bookmark, Refrigerator Magnet) no doubt I am not a terrorist suspect. Got through and dashed for home. Finally made it home at 12:12 AM.

So there you have it, Adventure complete. Lots of photos here.

Finally re-cooperated from the hellish trip home, I give you Part 5 of the Vermont Adventure …

The next day we awoke with satisfied memories of our dinner at the Bearded Frog. I was almost immediately chastised by Phlerb that my entry did not give enough detail to the appetizers or desert items. So, always one to please let me tell you more about them!

They were good.

After breakfast we started the process of getting ready to head out for hike number two. You would think that we would have had our fill after our last outing, but with limited time left in Vermont, we figured it would be best to squeeze in as much nature as possible.

This time however everyone walking sticks thanks to Phlerb and his wickedly sharp pruning shears. And thanks to our prior visit to the shoe store, Karin had something other than Tevas to hike in.

I should take a minute to talk about traveling in Vermont. We had decided early on that we wanted to if all possible all ride in the same car. Seven people would put their mini-van at capacity, but hey its a mini-van that’s what its for right?

Well, as luck would have it, we were unable to secure all three car seats in the back row. As Phlerb and I offered what we thought was a great idea (him and I riding in his Miata convertible and the women and children riding in the mini-van), Shanin decided to see if she could fit in between the two kids in the back.

Basically into a spot the size of a lunchbox. I saw visions of myself flying around mountain corners at high speeds in the Miata. Sadly — Shanin was able to fit (just barely).

So after everyone was squeezed in, we started out for Cantilever Rock. At just over a half mile Phlerb told us the trail was easier than the last hike.

And starting up the path to the trail we were all feeling pretty good about the hike. This was going to be a lot more relaxed. Our relaxed feeling quickly turned to exertion and sweat as we headed up the actual trail.

The sights were amazing, we went by at least three small waterfalls and over many small streams. Thankfully there weren’t any really steep drop offs like the day before, but there were still a number of really challenging rocks to climb. We had a few stumbles here and there but no-one got hurt like Karin did the last time.

About 3/4 of the way up the thunder started. Ominous as it sounded we thought it would miss us completely so we continued on. We almost made it too.

We weren’t more than fifty feet away of the cantilever rock when it started to pour and lightning. This time we were a little more prepared with food, but shelter or rain gear was nowhere to be found.

I have to admit, we were all freaked out, more for the kids safety than our own. Lightning was a real concern, and finding shelter suddenly became our top priority.

Thanks go to Phlerb who was awarded the “MVH” award (Most Valuable Hiker) as he scouted ahead and found this hidden cave area that was big enough for all of us to fit into and stay relatively dry, and absolutely safe from lightning (in recognition of his award Phlerb would later carve a MVH into his walking stick).

So we had some food and waited the storm out. Maverick was pretty freaked out by the cave and thought there must be monsters in it but eventually calmed down with some cuddles from mom.

Once the rain stopped the ladies headed out while Phil and I decided to climb onto the rock we had just been under. I took a few photos and we were on our way back down.

The car seat felt great as I eased my tired body into it and prepared to head back to the Phlerb compound. After dinner we put the kids down to bed early and kicked back on the couch and watched “Sixteen Candles” which Shanin had never seen. Phil and I finally cracked open the bottle of Absinthe and gave it a try. Sort of licorice like in taste, the 1/2 shot of it didn’t produce the psychotropic hallucination that I had hoped for, maybe on the next trip.

A slight correction, Borat was watched on Friday (Part 1), the new King Kong was watched on Saturday (Part 2), and I am just too lazy right now to go back and change my earlier posts. But I digress…

Cranky and cantankerous we awoke to yet another dreary day. After what had already been a whirlwind tour of all things Vermont, we decided to just take it easy. Now I myself consider kicking back on the couch with a block of cheese in my boxers taking it easy (Seinfeld reference for those who care). My friend Phlerb is the same way.

Our wives however have a slightly different idea of taking it easy. As we would soon learn our destination was the Echo Children’s Museum in Burlington. The exhibit currently in house was on dinosaurs, a classic topic that all kids seem to love so it at least had an entertainment factor built into it.

We started our day with another Jericho staple — breakfast at the local coffee shop (The Village Cup). I am coffee nut as many know, and I have to say they served a good cup — or should I say pint of coffee. In what I can safely say was the first time ever, I was served a latte in a pint glass. The latte foam reminded me of a Guinness head when served in a pint.

The coffee was hot, and that glass did little to hamper its inferno temperature. If I was eighty and in a McDonald’s and served it this way I would surely have dropped it in my lap and sued for millions. Why can’t I remember to do that?

After scarfing down a croissant sandwich we started out for Burlington. The Echo Museum turned out to be a really cool place. The kids just ate it up, they ooh’d and ahh’d and ran, and played for a few hours as we took in the museums sights and sounds. By now it was late afternoon and we decided to stop for lunch.

Easier said than done. Our first few attempts to find a restaurant came up bust — either out of business or just closed, we ended up happily at a little hole in the wall Chinese food place which had the best hand made crab ran goons I have had in a long time.

Heading home we kicked back and let the kids play for a while before Grandma Phlerb was to come over. I think we were all looking forward to a nice quiet night out without the kids. We decided to go to a restaurant called the Bearded Frog. It sounds like it would be a bar you would find in Key West, but in reality its cuisine is in fact fine dining.

From the moment we stepped into the car our minds were focused on one thing — calamari! We had our fill and more. I won’t bore you with details other than to tell you what I had (mainly so I don’t forget) — sesame crusted sliced tuna steak with wasabi infused potato salad. The tuna was rare with what I believe was a balsamic and cream sauce. It took every bit of willpower I had to not tear into it like a ravenous beast of some sort.

Settling in for the night we decided to do yet another day of hiking which should maker for some very interesting reading in Part 5. Until then …

After our day of trekking through and up the mountain we decided to scale back our activities a bit and head into Burlington for the Farmers Market. On our way we decided to stop at a local shoe store to try and find some shoes better suited for hiking. My friend Phlerb was wearing what looked to be Italian made sandals after all, and my wife Karin had on Tevas. Something had to be done.

Surprisingly enough, we all ended up with new shoes. I was especially happy because they had a pair of hiking boots big enough to fit my size 15 gunboats, and more importantly that were only $49.99! What a deal.

After spending far too much time in the shoe store we headed on to what is quite possibly the biggest Farmers Market I have ever been to — it is better described as an art, craft and food market with farm fresh produce available.

Vermont is known for its Maple syrup and after sampling a few of the Dragonfly Maple syrup offering we left with three large flasks of their darker maple syrup. We also ended up trying some of the Samosa Man’s fried samosas (triangular pieces of dough with filling friend to a golden perfection) which were pretty damn tasty.

Burlington is a college town and it has that laid back college feel. As we walked around the park you couldn’t help but notice that there were dogs everywhere, people relaxing in the shade and kids running without a care in the world. It was an odd thing for me to see. In Illinois we have a deeper mistrust in the common man. Everyone is a potential kidnapper or child abuser.

Its sad to say and even admit, but its true. We live with a paranoia of the worst possible things and it seems like the most normal thing in the world. In Vermont, the lack of such feelings is disconcerting to say the least. But I digress.

Moving on, we headed to Church street which we would learn was perpetually closed to give people a place to walk, performers a place to entertain, and artisans and food purveyors a place to hawk their wares. The thing I especially liked was the alabaster church spire that rose above the din of commotion in the street. It was like a beacon calling us to it.

Along the way we stopped to play of various huge boulders strewn along the way on the sidewalk — the kids could not get enough of climbing on these huge rocks from its glacial past. When we were about halfway to our destination we began to hear a distant thundering of drums.

As the noise drew steadily louder Karin told me it was the 25th Anniversary Gay Pride Parade. Well all right I thought, thinking back to how wild the Chicago parade was in the past, I knew deep down that it would be watered down somewhat given the number of children present.

Never the less, I took a lot of photos which I will be sure to post when I get back home. After the parade we continued our trek to the end of the street and the kids played around in the ground level recessed spray fountains. Phil and I quietly stepped away to look in local bookstore for hidden treasures.

As the day closed we again found ourselves exhausted and ready to just chill out. After dinner we put the kids to bed and queued up Borat on the big screen. It was as Sacha would say — “Very Nice!”

When last we spoke, we had just arrived at our friends house in Jericho Vermont. Since it was around dinner time we did little more than setting in, have some pizza and drinks. The next morning I went for a run and returned to find breakfast and more importantly, coffee waiting.

As we enjoyed the sweet flavors of an apple coffee cake and the pleasant taste of hazelnut coffee, I let the calming sounds of the river outside their house wash over me. It felt like the stress of the world was just melting off my psyche. My wife and I could live in that room and die happy people.

Caffeine infused we started to murmur about what we would do for the day. Out of nowhere our friend and host Phlerb announced his game plan for the day. It sounded more well thought out than anything we had uttered so we quickly embraced his plan without question.

The plan was to pack a picnic lunch and head out to the Green Mountain Coffee store. The actual store mind you, ground zero. I have a plethora of pictures that will be posted, and a review destined for Brotherhood of the Bean when I get back, for now take my word for it that the coffee and the store was something to remember.

Coffee could only hold our kids attention for so long — luckily for us there was a nice park outside that they could run around like banshees in for a little while. But not too long, our next Vermont stop was none other than Ben & Jerry’s Ice Cream headquarters.

Pulling into the parking lot it was amazing how many different state license plates there were. It didn’t seem to matter if the state was close or far, the call of Ben & Jerry’s is quite powerful. Heading into the store we purchased tickets for a tour and braved the crowd to buy souvenirs/trinkets. With a bit of time to spare we wandered around outside. They had a few games for the kids outside that they had fun doing, along with a spin art station where they all made their own spin art. Soon enough our tour started and we were herded into an auditorium to see a short video about the history of the company.

Moving on to the viewing station we had a birds eye view of the production floor… Guess what? Its a factory. Wheeeee! Admittedly it was pretty cool to hear about the different sections and what they did, but in the end I think everyone had their fill of factory fun, and we headed down for some free ice cream samples. Yum — Strawberry Cheesecake!

From here we started towards Smuggler’s Notch. A Vermont cave used by you guessed it… Smugglers. If you want my truthful opinion, it was a dank wet hole that Phlerb decided to crawl up into in his Italianesque sandals and slipped and fell on his ass giving him a cool stain on his white shorts. I decided to pass on the experience.

We did however climb up the surrounding hillside and found a nice spot to have our lunch. It was amazing just how high we were after a short climb. Phlerb and I ended up heading out to an outcropping we had seen some kids on from the street.

After lunch we were still feeling in the mood for a hike so Phlerb suggested we check out something called the “Long Trail” that led to a hidden pond called — Sterling Pond. This sounded like a cool adventure to all of us, so without any hesitation we headed out. Maverick and I had our walking sticks we picked up at the Morton Arboretum and I was SO glad we had them after a few minutes of — “hiking”.

Now when I think of the word hiking, I envision walking up a pine needle strewn path, or over a meadow etc. This version of Vermont hiking involved walking 1.1 miles up the mountain over some of the most brutal terrain I have ever encountered.

• Slippery Rocks? Check.
• Dead inducing drop offs? Check.
• Dripping Water? Check.
• Big/Medium/Small boulders to walk over? Check.
• Four & Six year old children in tow? Check.

I have been on easier treks with the National Guard infantry, and that is no exaggeration. But, after speaking with a few people as they came down who assured us that we were 3/4 of the way to the top, we pressed on. When we finally emerged at the actual “Long Trail” it was over two hours from our start. A short .1 mile walk downhill and we were at the hidden Sterling Pond.

Sterling pond was gorgeous. The water was ice cold but that didn’t stop us from putting our feet in. The kids played on the rocks and laughed in the sun. For as brutal of a climb as that was, they didn’t hardly complain at all. After our break we decided to head back down, we were ready for the adventure to be at an end.

Going down was easier than going up, but it was decidedly more painful on the knees. We took our time and emphasized safety. I was so proud with how well Maverick was using his walking stick. He really took technique direction well and listened, I really felt like he and I were a team.

Karin was behind us going down. During both the ascent and descent the adults took turns holding a kids hand. It was just too dangerous to allow them to go it alone. We had almost reached the bottom when Karin took a spill and got some nasty road rash on her arm. Thankfully she didn’t have a kid at the time and wasn’t at one of the really dangerous areas. The cause of her fall was none other than crappy shoes (Tevas). We decided after that to get some better footwear.

We were tired and beat by the time we got home, but in generally pretty content in our accomplishment. Shanin started to make chicken fajitas while we all washed up. They were excellent and literally inhaled by everyone. We ended the night watching Borat which was — “Very Nice!!!” and headed to bed.

More to come in Vermont Adventure (Part 3)

Our Vermont adventure began on the 4th at 5:30AM. Having our son’s birthday party at another location than our house turned out to be an excellent idea. So much less mess, so much less drama. Without much fanfare, we started on our way.

Traveling on the 4th was great, we zipped along on roads that were close to empty. Now we had been warned about Ohio, our friends Kah-Nicki and Eric warned us that Ohio police would be on the prowl and they were out in force. So many people gave us dirty looks for only going a bit over the speed limit, but after seeing 6 people pulled over, I just didn’t care (Screw you Ohio!).

After around 8.5 hours of driving we pulled into Erie, PA. Turning off the toll road my son Maverick excitedly asked if the Holiday Inn with the indoor water park was our hotel. We explained that it was not, and as we turned down the road and saw the Country Inn & Suites that we were staying at I said:

“Wow! Check out our hotel, isn’t it cool!”

To which he replied:

“No. Our hotel is boring.”

LOL, too funny. Mental note for the next trip. The only saving grace we had was that our hotel did have a swimming pool. Even it provided comedy relief — my wife encountered not one but two stray long pieces of hair that she was quick to point out were not her own. Very funny to watch.

Rising up bright and early the next morning we were once again on the road. I won’t bore you with details of the trip, it went on and on and on (10.5 Hours!). It was very cool driving through the Adirondack mountains and along Lake George. It really made for a nice change from the bland tollway driving.

Crossing over the bridge to Vermont we could practically taste the Maple syrup in the air. Just being in Vermont had us excited we knew that it was just a matter of time before we were at our friends. I was stoked because Vermont is so different from Illinois. Illinois is flat, nature scrubbed, track-home laden and boring. From what I have seen of Vermont, it is wooded, green, mountainous and a complete 180 of what I am used to seeing in Illinois.

As we pulled into Jericho the thing that really threw me for a loop was the complete and utter lack of fast food restaurants and annoying billboards, signs and clutter. There just don’t exist, and as I would learn later it was on purpose. Wicked cool if you ask me.

In no time we found ourselves on Old Pump road, crossing a one lane bridge over the Browns river. We turned down the road to their house, road mind you, not driveway and I just fell in love with the land, the river and woods. When my friends moved from Illinois I was really bummed, but after seeing Vermont and their home I could not be more supportive of their move. In fact, I find myself thinking about moving here.

More of the Vermont Adventure to come in Part 2.