In the house I grew up in the single dominating feature was the backyard. Large looming oak trees (3) and a deep expanse of grass that seemed to go on forever to my young eyes.

Other notable features included a sandbox on the far back/right corner, this was also the location of the occasional compost bin back when leaf pickup was a thing of the future.

At one point there was a large strawberry patch, grape vines and an assortment of fruit trees that I can’t recall ever eating. The garden held a special spot in the back/left side of the lawn. A wooden privacy fence kept kids and neighbors out, but all too often became something that I would fall off.

I loved that backyard, I would spend endless hours out there playing under the oak tree canopy that kept the yard shady on even the hottest day.

Although many things changes in that backyard, one thing remained constant — my Father’s riding lawnmower.

The yard was a little less than a quarter acre in size, big enough to warrant the need for a riding mower. Mowing that lawn was something my Father always took very seriously.

As a result, the lawn was impeccable. I suspect that the riding mower played a large part in that equation of excellence. Over the years he had a number of different makes and models. Names like Snapper, Simplicity and TORO were well known in our house.

When I bought my first house my Dad gave me the old Snapper trim mower. It didn’t matter to me that it was only 12 or 14 inches wide (can’t recall), it was a great mower that had been part of the Lange lawn tradition.

It was a sad day when it died, but a self propelled TORO push mower took its place. The TORO has done a decent enough job, being a mulcher it tends to get bogged down in certain shade areas, but all in all it works pretty decent.

My lawn is marginal at best. But that is about to change. On a recent call from by Dad:

Steve, I’ve decided to buy a new Simplicity mower.

What?? I think, he just bought that zero turn radius TORO less than four years ago. I ask what was wrong with it.

Oh nothing, I just don’t really care for it and want to go back to a Simplicity.

Okay, that I can understand — when he bought the TORO initially I was somewhat surprised that he went with a zero turn radius mower, it does have a learning curve. What he said next shocked me.

“Do you think you would want my old mower? They won’t give me squat on a trade in.”

“Of course I would love to have it!” I exclaimed.

At this point Karin starts to look at me funny, no doubt wondering what hair-brain thing I have just agreed to take as I shower him with thank yous.

So I have a riding lawnmower being delivered on this Saturday morning. My Dad even paid to have it delivered and like a typical parent refused to let me pay for the delivery.

This may sound crazy, and the thought of having a riding mower on with a lawn my size seems excessive at best — but I think my lawn is on the brink of a major change for the better. I am looking forward to see if this mower is its ticket to excellence.

Its something that after almost thirty-eight years I take completely for granted. Like most I don’t have to think about reading — what is that word? what does it mean? — or writing — how does it look? how did I form that letter “a” ?

For my six year old son, its an entirely different story. Kindergarten, and learning to read. Not something I remember from way back when in kindergarten, about the most I can muster from those days is a memory of a prop hatchet that my Dad made for a class play and the fact that it wasn’t returned much to my dismay.

What I find myself struggling with is how I can best help him with learning to read and write. His teachers are great, and their teaching materials are amazing. But it doesn’t change the fact that right not its hard for him, and he get frustrated easy.

Through the praise and encouragement I asked him today if he had ever heard the phrase –

“Practice Makes Perfect.”

He shook his head no and I went on to tell him that it means that we only get better at things by practicing. I brought up his experience riding the bike, how when he started he kept falling and was having a really rough time with it.

But he stuck with it, and before he knew it he was riding his bike with relative ease. He succeeded because he practiced. The correlation worked well, and I could tell by his eyes that he understood what I was talking about. But it didn’t make it any easier.

I just can’t wait for him to be able to unlock the secret worlds and adventures that await him in the book world. With an imagination like his it will be as much of a candy store for him as it is for me.

I guess it’s because I have so few Dad & Son only memories that I try to make it a point to have special time with my son where it is just the two of us. Now don’t get me wrong, my Dad is great father, and I know we did have those special times, but my memories are such that I can only really remember a few of them.

Chances are Maverick won’t remember a lot of the things we did together, but at least this way one of those times will be documented should he ever forget, or want to put me in a crappy nursing home God forbid!

It was a morning either destined to be spent doing something fun, or doing work outside. I opted for the second for obvious reasons on the day of rest.

My wife had a business function so I decided to take Maverick to the Morton Arboretum. The crisp cool air and brightly shining sun were a perfect combination for hiking.

After quickly loading the car we were on our way, windows down, sunglasses on. Little did I know the negotiation was about to begin.

“Dad, can we go to the children’s garden first?” Maverick asked from the back seat.

“Well I really didn’t want you to get your feet wet before the hike” I replied with unfailing logic.

[Insert Pause]

“Dad, how about this — We go to the hand water area of the children’s garden, then go for a hike and after go to the feet water area of the children’s garden.”

Curses. His logic was sound, I had been out foxed by a six year old. I agreed to his plan, and we both felt satisfied.

Sitting down to watch Maverick at the hand water park, I started to plot out the hike I wanted to take. I had earlier talked to our friend Mary from marytree.blogspot.com and she suggested we go to “big rock”.

Having never been it sounded like a great idea. That is until I saw it was the furthest point from the visitor center. Easily three miles away.

Crap, would he be up for it? I worried about his shoes. He had worn ones more appropriate for the water. I decided to just take the hike slow and turn around when he wanted to.

It was time for a move to another play area that had sand. Again Maverick joined the multitude of kids playing in it and I brought the tunnel vision online and locked onto my target (my son).

When it was time to head out for the hike I made a fatal mistake. He had buried his feet in the sand and wanted to rinse them off. The smart thing to do would have been to go to the water jump.

What did I do? Let him go to the foot water area. As I watched him run around on the rocks, I saw a girl who was soaked from head to toe and got a bad feeling about this decision.

Sure enough he slipped and sat in the water. The back of his shorts were soaked through. What can you do in a situation like that but sigh, smile and shake your head at how great it is to watch him just being a boy.

So we started on our hike, I was sure it would be over in no time with his wet shorts. But between the Sun and the breeze they quickly dried.

Walking through the trails I loved our conversations on his favorite subjects (Star Wars), about the forest, about his friends, and about some of the things I knew had been bugging him. It was a nice non-threatening time and I think it was good for both of us.

When we were about halfway to the “big rock” the mosquitos hit us in full force. Now for some reason I have an immunity to whatever it is in the mosquito that causes those itching bumps from happening. I still get bit, but that is the extent of my affliction.

Maverick however is like his Mom, a mosquito magnet who is affected by their bite. I felt like such a dumb ass for forgetting the spray! But onward we went.

As we approached our destination a shortcut was offered to us, and we gladly took it. Big rock it would turn out, was just that. A big rock.

I don’t know why I had visions of a 40 foot tall rock, the reality was much, much less. Take a look at my flickr to the right and you can see it. Heading back I carried him on my shoulders for a while to give him a break much to his enjoyment.

We stopped for a strawberry fruit pop and some yogurt afterwards. Time had flown by, the children’s garden was now closed, but that didn’t stop Maverick. There was still a hill and kids rolling down it. That was enough for him.

It was a good day.

This Friday is my son Maverick’s first day of kindergarten. I can hardly believe that he is six! It seems like yesterday that I was holding this little bundle of crying boy child in my arms and wondering what his life would be like. Wondering how I would be as a Father.

And now its six years later. We have had bumps, falls, bruises, laughter, crying, joy. We have changed disgusting diapers, smelled things no human should have to smell, and been more excited about potty training than any basketball/football or hockey championship.

We have watched his personality develop and taken pride in his good natured kindness to his friends, family and pets. I have cheered as he has embraced Star Wars, and shaken my head at his insistence on tucking in his shirt, no matter what type.

And now he is headed to kindergarten. Its the start of his school career, and in a way, the end of his innocence. There will be things I can’t shield him from, people who will take advantage of his good nature — slowly, slowly but surely, his innocence will start to be lost.

Its an odd thing to consider really. I love seeing him grow up, and hope that his school experience is more enjoyable than mine ever was. In retrospect I am so glad that we decided to wait until he was six to start kindergarten. He is so much more ready emotionally for school.

I used to dread going to school, and now I find myself dreading this Friday. I know in my head that time doesn’t stop for anyone, but in a selfish sort of way I kind of wish it could. I love him. He is the best thing that ever happened to us, and while I will smile and be excited for him, inside I will, and I know Karin will be sorry to see our baby go to school.

If you stop and think about it, my generation the thirty something crowd born at the tail end of the sixties has grown up with war, turmoil and hate.

Our grandfathers had WWII and Korea, and our fathers had Vietnam, but theirs were eras of internal hate. Racism, the ugly blotch on our society that still today festers in the hearts of so many misguided fools.

But today we face racism from abroad, people taught to hate us because of who we are, what we have and whom we choose to help. Our government has made huge sweeping mistakes, meddled where they should not have meddled, and in the end have led us down a path of international hate that only continues to spiral out of control.

What is the solution? Is it something we can solve, fix, replace. No. Its that sort of thinking that got us into this mess. Is the only solution to mind our own business, go back to a cold war era?

I wish I could have grown up when my dad was a boy, it was 1938… how was his life? I’d like to think it was a lot better that it is now, but how was it to have to deal with racism. As a white man it was no doubt pretty damn easy. Would another of color think this was a golden era? Absolutely not.

The answer I think is that the scale stand in balance right now, with no interruption or change, they will topple and the world will become a much worse place as things continue to escalate.

But, and this is a big but — if we can make it move the other direction, if the Middle East can find their own peace, and if we can get the hell out of there, I think we could be on the verge of a truly Golden Age.

Have any ideas on how me can help it along? I’ll be posting mine as I think of them, I’d love it if you did too.

So I have a lot more respect and understanding for the stay at home mothers of the world. As a working Dad, I find it all too easy to fall into trap of thinking that mom’s have it easy. And while I still hold that even the worst day at home is better than some of the chuckle heads we Dad’s have to deal with at work — staying at home isn’t all bon bons.

Case in point — my wife is watching two other boys for the summer and next school year. They are great boys, all three of them get along great but even the best friendships can become strained when one person has the Yoda light saber that the other wants to use since he is Kit Fisto (jedis).

Its like a constant stream of screaming, running, jumping, negotiating, some whining, some crying all on top of the food requests that never seem to end. Sure there are not any jerks or asshats to deal with like at work, but it is like a fine sandpaper that slowly eats away at your veneer of patience.

Being a stay at home mom isn’t as easy as I once thought, God bless them for their patience. I am still distantly jealous, jealous from afar if you will but like the saying goes — the grass is always greener on the other side of the septic tank.